31/12/13 - farewell//new year's eve

The combination of both the internet and the media seem intent on insisting that 2013 has been absolutely stunning. I appear to be in the minority in that I am not struggling to let go of this past year. It has been beautiful and insightful and educational. But mostly it's been painful and lonely and cold. It's been long. And difficult. It's been really fucking difficult. And I am not sorry to see it go. I am glad to be on the other side of this year.
Here I am, two stone lighter, short brown hair, in on New Year's Eve with my parents and my dog. A year ago, I was in London, freezing my arse off with my best friend on a bridge in London, with long, red, bedraggled hair and a quiet weight on my heart. That weight grew in this last year, and it's not quiet at all now. But I'm not alone. I am not fighting alone.
I haven't written nearly as much as I ought have in the last months. I haven't post photos from South Africa. I haven't ticked off all the things on my check list. But I've got a tidy room and a tidy mind and I'm with people that love me. And this year has been hard, but I'm ending it right. I'm through the other side.
To 2014.